


Existing Together

by netheritetulips



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft - Fandom
Genre: Character Death, Childhood Best Friends Sapnap & Dream, Hanahaki Disease, Inspired by Saturn by sleeping at last, M/M, Mention Of Suffocation, Mentions of Death, Sapnap centric mostly, Sapnap has Hanahaki Disease, Underage Drinking, very much sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:21:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28251561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/netheritetulips/pseuds/netheritetulips
Summary: Sapnap slowly dies (literally) watching the love of his life fall in love with someone else, but strangely, he's okay with that.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound, Clay | Dream/Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 16
Kudos: 283





	Existing Together

**Author's Note:**

> I highly recommend listening to Saturn by Sleeping At Last while reading this!! This is kind of crappy cos I kind of rushed the ending but oh well, I might rewrite that bit later :))

Dream liked the stars. They fascinated him, always have. For as long as he could remember, any chase he got, he would stare up at the night sky and just wonder. Was there anything out there? How did stars stay so bright? Was there anyone else who was just as fascinated with the night sky as he was? Were they his soulmate? Did soulmates exist?

He has to admit, he was pretty silly as a kid, but it was okay. After a few years, he had met him. Who was him? Why, his best friend, of course. They had met at Chuck E Cheese. 8-year-old Dream was brought there for his little sister’s birthday party and had taken it upon himself to explore every square inch of the play park.

There, he met Sapnap. He was 6 at the time, a small pudgy boy with tears streaming down his face because he couldn’t find his way out. After calming the younger down, Dream had slowly lead Sapnap out of the play structure with Sapnap clutching his hand for dear life the whole time.

The rest was history. They grew up, hung out, did everything together. Their love for space was a big thing in their friendship. They spent many school nights in middle school learning and studying constellations and the functions of different things in space. 

To be honest, Dream would definitely not be the man he is today without Sapnap. The younger had been such a big part of his life and he really could not imagine his life without his loud ass barging into his room whenever he wanted. He truly showed Dream how rare and beautiful it was to even exist, and Dream was thankful for that.

Things slightly shifted once they started college, however. Despite their love for space, neither desired to pursue it as a career, wanting to keep their interest as a fun hobby reserved for the two of them. They were still as close as ever, they studied together as much as possible and even shared a dorm together. 

What caused the shift then?

George.

Since the two best friends had different majors, they shared no classes, only spending lunches with each other during the day. This, in turn, leads to them making friend separately.

They had made friends with people before Dream found George, Sapnap having befriended a boy named Sam, and Dream meeting a boy named Darryl. 

George, though, George was different.

You see, Sapnap had decided at the very young age of 12 that he and Dream were soulmates and that’s just how things were. I mean, how could you not come to that conclusion? After a major event during his sophomore year of high school, he never questioned the fact ever again.  
George made him question it.

It had been a late night. It was just after exams so they took it as an excuse to celebrate, all of them decided to hangout in Sapnap and Dream’s tiny little living room in their room. It was Sapnap, Dream, Sam, Darryl, and George, who Sapnap had never met before then

George had met everyone else before then so the only introductions being made were between him and Sapnap. When they greeted each other, Sapnap thought they would make great friends.

Oh, how he was so wrong.

That night, the poisonous flower had taken root in his lungs, although he didn’t know it yet.

It took root when he noticed how Dream laughed when talking to George When he noticed the lingering touches. When he realized they were stuck in their own little world together. Their own little world that didn’t include Sapnap.

That night, Sapnap cried himself to sleep only to wake up to throw up a mix of the alcohol he had drunk to numb himself, a bit of blood, and yellow chrysanthemum petals.

Sapnap went pale at the sight.

There was no way, it couldn’t be. A case hadn’t been documented in 5 years. Why did he have to be the one? Why him?

It was while he was cleaning up when it really hit him.

He was going to die.

He was going to die at the age of 19 because he was in love with his childhood best friend who didn’t feel the same way in the slightest bit. 

The next few weeks were filled with the 19-year-old crying and suffering, the flower within him growing more and more, squeezing the life out of his lungs bit by bit. During those few weeks, Sapnap realized that he couldn’t just sit and mope.

He needed to face this head-on.

For Dream.

The months leading up to his death were spent helping Dream.

He helped him with school work, dumb professors, petty arguments, hell, he even helped him pick out his mother’s Christmas present.

He also took part in Dream’s elaborate way to ask Geroge out.

He had surprised him on his birthday, as cliche as it is. It was cute, Sapnap had to admit, even if he had a subconscious resentment towards the male. Dream had gone all out with balloons and flowers and a handmade sign, it was quite adorable.

When Dream had taken George outside for a walk, that’s when the roots wrapped around his lungs decided they wanted to squeeze the air out of him. Sapnap doubled over, coughing and hacking, yellow chrysanthemum petals spewing out his mouth.

The rest of the boys froze, gasps being heard from all of them.

Sam was the first the jump into action, running to grab water while Darryl tried to soothe the now sobbing 19-year-old. He told them everything that night, practically begged them not to tell Dream or George.

“I just.. I just want him to be happy!” He has sobbed into Sam’s chest.

That night was also when his health noticeably took a turn for the worst.

Sapnap expected it, of course, it had just come a lot sooner than he thought. So, so much sooner.

It took Dream a while to even notice, he was so hung up on George. He was almost never home, spent lunches with George, and blew off everyone else for the boy, Sapnap included. 

It wasn’t until the two went for their annual camping trip. They did it every year, they went to their special spot where they would just stare at the night sky and talk about anything and everything. The two never got bored of talking to one another.

It was around midnight on their last night there, they sat on their usual rock, sharing a bottle of Hennessy. They sat 

“You know,” Sapnap started, pulling his legs up to his chest, “I think life carries on long after death like light for stars do.”

Dream only hummed, taking another sip from the bottle.

“I’m dying, Clay.”

That caught Dream’s attention. He choked on the drink, immediately whipping his head around to look at his best friend.

“What do you-”

“I cried about it for so long but over time, I learned to face it head-on. I mean, it’s inevitable. I learned that death is going to come no matter what, whether it’s now, in a few months, or 50 years from now but you can’t just sit around fearing it. You have to go on, do what you want to do with your life, and almost welcome it, in a way. Face it head-on, because there’s no way to avoid it.”

That’s when Dream noticed. How much paler, weaker Sapnap looked. He looked to have lost quite a bit of weight too, and he swore he could hear him almost wheezing as he breathed.

“Sapnap, I-” Dream started, reaching out for his hand only to quickly retract his own hand, gasping at how cold he felt. He could tell it wasn’t just from the cold air that surrounded them.

“It’s okay, don’t worry,” Sapnap said, tears welling up in his eyes as Dream slowly scooted closer to him, “I’m glad I even had a chance to exist. To exist here, with you.”

Dream leaned into Sapnap as the other explained, coughing here and there, how rare and beautiful it was to even exist. How he needed to live his life like he was the main character, needed to live life without hate.

“You never know when your time is up.” He had whispered just as Dream started crying, tears slowly starting their descent down his face. 

“Remember, the universe was made just to be seen by your eyes.”

Dream had asked him to say it over and over, trying to engrave it into his memory, and Sapnap happily did, because he’d do anything to make Dream happy.

They spent the rest of the night crying in each other’s arms, never once letting go of each other.

In the months leading up to Sapnap’s death, Dream had asked him to say what he had said that night again and again. It was only when they were alone and it was always when Dream was crying.

Dream felt as if he should’ve recorded it or written it down but he never found the time to, he was so focused on Sapnap, he didn’t want to ruin it.

Sapnap died on February 14th. Exactly two months after the camping trip. It also happened to be Valentine’s day, the one day that Dream had stepped away from practically coddling the 19-year-old to spend it with his boyfriend.

Dream will never forget the image of Sam and Darryl sobbing over Sapnap’s still body, yellow chrysanthemum petals surrounding them. He was given a note that Sam said Sapnap had written about 5 minutes before he suffocated.

"It was lovely to exist with you, Clay."

Now, it was February 14th, three years later.

He lived his life just as Sapnap told him to. He lived like he was the main character, he didn’t let anything get in his way, and he lived life for both of them.

Except he just simply could not live life without hate. 

It was impossible because Dream hated yellow chrysanthemums.


End file.
